Final Thoughts Before Bedtime on Birthday #25

I've decided I like getting older.

I like thinking of all that I have to look forward to. I like thinking about being so close to being a teacher-- so much closer than I was two years ago, just after graduation. I like thinking ahead, about finishing my fifth year of teaching, and having so much more figured out by then. I like the SOUND of 25, and I like that it makes me one year more experienced than the kids I'm supposed to be guiding. I like that I LOOK more like a woman. I like knowing that I have climbed mountains that seemed impassable-- that I have walked through some of hell and came out singed, but surviving, I like knowing that I am THAT strong. I like finding the new thoughts every day, and finding the new me in the mirror. I like thinking about all that I've figured out, and I like that one of the figured-out things is that I have so much left yet to figure.

I like thinking about middle-age, and motherhood, and the tired sort-of happiness that must come from the day-ins-and-outs. I like thinking about falling in love-- and do you know what? I really do feel sure that it's going to happen again-- not just the falling in love, because that's not very hard is it? But the staying in love-- I really do feel sure that it's coming. I think I have a while to wait still, but I'm HAPPY to be here. To be me, and to be looked after by a good Lord. To be one year older, and one more bit closer to that meeting, and I like knowing that I will be that much more FULL-HEARTED, and THOUGHT-FILLED when we-- he and I-- discover each other. I like thinking about becoming a counselor, maybe, when I'm ready for a change from teaching. I like thinking about reading books to my children, and nursing them through fevers, and getting muddy with them on rainy days, and buying first prom dresses and renting first tuxedos. I like thinking about putting wrinkle cream on in my 40's, and sighing at getting older, and then grinning at all the wrinkles represent, and maybe going out and getting a new spunky haircut. I like thinking about being old-- about retiring, and then maybe working in a florist shop, just for fun-- and making all the young men tell me about who they're buying flowers for. I like thinking of the fabulous HATS I'll wear over my white hair, and the elaborate walking sticks I'll swing about. I like thinking about being eccentric, and just a little crazy-- crazy enough so that I can say whatever I want-- but WISE enough that my children and grandchildren still come to me for advice. I would like to be wise. Maybe I'll write a book! And where else in the WORLD will I go? Everywhere!

I just feel like I have so much to look FORWARD to.

And I will continue to blow bubbles, and I will continue to slide down stair-railings, and I will continue to jump on available trampolines, and I will continue to believe in fairies, because being 25 only means I have that much more perspective in understanding how utterly SCRUMPTIOUS all those pastimes are.

I feel good about the way I've lived life so far. I like the way I live life. I don't have any regrets-- that's a blessing, isn't it?? And Pastor Richard told me it just keeps getting better from here on out, so PRAISE THE LORD.

And happy birthday to me!