Sometimes, life is like spilled orange juice.

You pull it out because you're trying to be healthy. You have great visions of Vitamin C. It will be refreshing, you think. It will be good.

And then it spills, and your dreams of orange juice grandeur are crushed. You must change your pants. You must sop up pulp. You must sweat and swear.

I did not spill orange juice.

I did spill metaphorical orange juice.

Damndamndamn.